So true. And I think a lot of it has to do with the writers seeing everything from her POV and automatically forgiving everything she does, never bothering to show us her real emotions or reasons for behaving horribly, and never, ever making her apologize or show remorse. Within the narrative, she gets away with such horrible acts, stuff that Spike or Anya would never be forgiven for. It's like the core scoobies are just better than everyone else, and Buffy is best of all, so they don't have to face the consequences of theirs actions like everyone else does.