Just to clarify...

[rusty_halo]

I just want to clarify something from my previous post. I don't dislike James Marsters as a person or anything to that effect. Every interaction I've had with him personally has been positive, and every impression I've gotten from seeing him at cons is that he is kind, thoughtful, considerate, friendly, and funny. He's not perfect, but he doesn't have a giant attitude or anything either, and he seems, basically, like a very cool guy.

While I don't have a problem with him as a PERSON, I do have a big problem with his attitude toward Spike and toward his female fans, which I explained in this post. I have every right to disagree with his opinions, as he made them abundantly clear, over and over, at the con this weekend. The world would be a very sucky place indeed if no one was allowed to debate or disagree with another person's point of view.

The fact that I disagree with his opinions does not mean I have a problem with him as an individual. I have NEVER bashed James Marsters.

(And btw, if you want to unfriend me because you think I don't have the right to disagree with someone else's OPINION, then fine. Good riddance.)

Comments

[hecatehatesthat.livejournal.com]

::pats you on the back::

The hypocrisy behind the idea of defriending you over a fandom kerfuffle -- and this one in particular -- is either very funny or very sad.

Fandom can be so political -- eye roll -- but your post was perfectly PC.

[callherblondie.livejournal.com]

"Fandom can be so political." Wow is that ever true. I'm really new to LJ and the Buffy fandom so when I got defriended today after I wrote a rant about the JM kerfuffle in the heat of anger, I was really surprised and I guess a bit hurt. I still have respect for whoever defriended me but I guess if me posting a rant that I wrote while angry on my own personal LJ is grounds for a defriending than perhaps it was the right thing for the person to do, since we probably didn't have a whole lot in common. I wish this whole silly thing could die down. Fandom is scaring me right now.

[hecatehatesthat.livejournal.com]

Like drinkthepoisonx said, good riddance.

I have plenty of people on my friends list with whom I frequently disagree, but even if I wanted everyone on my list to only be people who see fandom the way I see it -- which would be silly, but nevermind that for the moment -- I wouldn't defriend anyone over one rant. Even if it was that we should all eat babies. I'd at least give you a chance to cool down and post a few more times before deciding I didn't want to read your journal anymore *ever,* no matter how immature you were *one time.* (And I haven't actually read your rant, so I don't know whether it was mean or immature or whatever.)

[callherblondie.livejournal.com]

What I wrote was very immature and mean and I take full responsibility for that. I left the post up because I believe that if I've written a very mean rant, I shouldn't try to cover my ass later when it offends a lot of people. I should own up to what I did. But it was honestly written while I was quite upset both over what I read about JM's comments and personal and school-related problems that I'm dealing with in RL. I also did post an apology but now I feel quite paranoid that I cannot write what I want for fear of having everyone defriend me ::sobs in insecurity:: I was really shocked that it happened since I really respect and admire the person (or what I know of her from her LJ), but I won't hold it against her.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Yeah, fandom seems to be a pretty ugly place lately.

[writteninstars.livejournal.com]

I don't know what to say to that. Just knowing that some people would "unfriend" you because of your opinion makes me sad. I would *never* unfriend you or anyone else for voicing your feelings. When I say I believe in freedom of expression, it extends to people/subjects I don't particularly agree with. 'Nuff said. Rant on, baby.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Yay for freedom of expression. :)

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

::Hugs you::

You have every right to your opinion, and every right to share it on your LJ.

I suspect that anyone who would defriend you over doing so has issues that have nothing to do with you *or* freedom of expression.

::More hugs::

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

*hugs you some more, too*

[drujan.livejournal.com]

Sweetie, your previous post did NOT come across as if you dislike JM as a person, not at all. And you have the right to disagree with JM's opinions. I think someone at the next conference should point out to him how his comments are being perceived by his fans.

As for me, I have a problem with ME. A big, huge problem with their attitude towards the fans and how we don't "get" their "message". I don't like one bit what JM had to say, but I suspect he's just a mouth piece of ME in this, as usual. Damn them.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Yeah, I'm really annoyed that I'm getting personally attacked over this nonsense.

[onetwomany.livejournal.com]

::hugs::

I may not always agree with your views, but I appreciate your rant, and think you show an incredible amount on intelligence and insight. I'll defend JM's right to have an opinion, but I would certainly never defriend you for having one too. And, yeah, good riddance to anyone who does :).

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Thanks. Yeah, I really wish that people would stick to debating opinions instead of insulting other people.

[aryas_zehral]

Babes, I would never defriend you should I disagree with you on one issue, or even more than one issue. It strikes me as rather... immature to do such a thing. Everyone has opinions and if we all had the same opinion on everything... don't you think that would be really boring?

TTFN,
S.

defriending

[klytaimnestra.livejournal.com]

All of which makes me feel like a total jerk because the person that actually should have been defriended was me - only I hadn't been friended in the first place, of course! But it was my response, not your post, that was being objected to.

So sorry it upset you when it was my fault. I deleted my post, which I shouldn't have made in the first place.

Re: defriending

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

It's not your fault; you have every right to your opinion, too. This person was either too dumb to distinguish who had posted what, or else she just decided to take her anger at a variety of people out on me. Either way, she's the one being immature.

Re: defriending

[queenofthorns.livejournal.com]

It's not the first time that the person in question has felt the need to jump in and defend James Marsters in the manner of a very determined pit-bull - this happened a few months ago when someone posted a not-so-flattering review of a "Ghost of the Robot" performance. I guess it's nice for James that he has such "loyal" and dedicated fans, but ... I always want to tell her to chill the hell out already!

Re: defriending

[aryas_zehral]

Wasn't upset. Am now confused tho.
S.

Re: defriending

[klytaimnestra.livejournal.com]

sorry, meant to respond to Laura's post instead of the reply to it - oops, K

Re: defriending

[aryas_zehral]

Thats what I thought it just took confused me for a sec.
S.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Yeah, exactly. I really don't get why people are attacking me personally just because they disagree with my opinions. It really is completely immature.

Thanks for being cool.

[ozfan.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I'm kind of relived I'm still a relative newbie to the LJ world. I don't understand what the hell is going on actually. All I know is that you were upset by JM's views, and you vented, and that's what LJ is about, and I never thought you said anything horrible about him as a person. You were just... ranting. Hmm. I"m so terribly naive and confused. I think I shall go drink some more wine now and go read a book!

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

That's the thing! I was just venting (in my LIVEJOURNAL, which is practically what LJ if for!) and I NEVER EVER said anything mean about JM as a person. Yet I got personally insulted and defriended because I supposedly "called James names," which, in fact, I never did.

[gorthead.livejournal.com]

I don't think it came across like you were bashing James Marsters at all, and if someone wants to unfriend you for having an opinion, then you're probably better off not having them as a friend anyway, imo.

I wrote JM a short letter just now, and I've just mailed it. I read it to a friend over the phone and she said it was mature and it didn't sound like I was pointing fingers, which I hope is true, and I think it gets my point across, without sounding accusatory, because I still like him as a person and admire him as an actor.

-Glop

[klytaimnestra.livejournal.com]

what a wonderful icon!

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

>>if someone wants to unfriend you for having an opinion, then you're probably better off not having them as a friend anyway<<

Yup, I think you're right. Thanks.

[chrisjournal.livejournal.com]

Oh man! Hugs to you, too. I'm all behind on LJ, and all I've run into today is big hububs. I haven't read many comments on this particular issue, just your original and A's, but jeez!

Maybe if we twist Grandma Helen's rain dance about a bit, we'll be able to bring joy back to fanland. I wonder if all this emotion is normal for when a fandom's show becomes defunct? I bet it is...

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Maybe we're all having our periods at once. After all, we're just wacky emotional women. ;)

Re:

[chrisjournal.livejournal.com]

LOL!!!! The online cycle coincidences are kinda scary, actually. But as the lone woman in a household full of males -- I utterly deny being the wacky emotional one. At least if wacky and emotional are accompanied by 'weak'. *grins*

Hope today's a better day all around!

[hazel75.livejournal.com]

You don't know me but, after having read your journal on this subject via a link provided at a board, I'd *like to* friend you if that's alright ;)

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Of course. Thanks. :)