Well, I think that the mutual hostility is what makes for the equality of the S/X relationship. Neither is going to give in to the other, and they both have very similar barriers to work through. They also both have enough advantages and disadvantages that neither is in the inherently inferior position, whereas with S/A, Angel's always in the superior position.
S/X, to me, is like early S/B (back when it seemed like S/B could overcome their issues together and grow together in an equal, but challenging, relationship) -- the hostility, the repressed sexual tension. Only instead of Spike having to get over that he's fallen for his mortal enemy, he has to deal with that he's fallen for an annoying white-hat kid. And Xander, like Buffy, has to get over that he's fallen for a vampire, a "thing" that he's supposed to hate. (And then he has to deal with "is Spike really a 'thing'?" which is neat to see.) Oh, and the fact that Spike's a guy (whereas I doubt Angel would care--and I think it's interesting to see Xander struggling with issues of sexuality.) And, as with S/B, deep down S/X have a lot in common, though they wouldn't want to admit it--they're both outsiders, they're both insecure, they both surround themselves with powerful women, they both struggle to fit in and find a place, etc.
So that's what I mean about S/X being equal--they struggle and go back and forth and it could go either way; you don't get the instant "Angel's on top" that you get with S/A most of the time.
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Date: 2003-10-14 05:17 pm (UTC)S/X, to me, is like early S/B (back when it seemed like S/B could overcome their issues together and grow together in an equal, but challenging, relationship) -- the hostility, the repressed sexual tension. Only instead of Spike having to get over that he's fallen for his mortal enemy, he has to deal with that he's fallen for an annoying white-hat kid. And Xander, like Buffy, has to get over that he's fallen for a vampire, a "thing" that he's supposed to hate. (And then he has to deal with "is Spike really a 'thing'?" which is neat to see.) Oh, and the fact that Spike's a guy (whereas I doubt Angel would care--and I think it's interesting to see Xander struggling with issues of sexuality.) And, as with S/B, deep down S/X have a lot in common, though they wouldn't want to admit it--they're both outsiders, they're both insecure, they both surround themselves with powerful women, they both struggle to fit in and find a place, etc.
So that's what I mean about S/X being equal--they struggle and go back and forth and it could go either way; you don't get the instant "Angel's on top" that you get with S/A most of the time.